I have a problem. It's called pride. I really struggle with this. The funny thing is that I never knew it was a problem until about 6 months ago. The Holy Spirit has revealed several of my faults to me, but I always wondered what they had in common. What is it in me that makes these things harder to deal with? One day unexpectedly, I got the answer.

I was reading a great book about marriage by a christian author. The author suggests that you take a quiet moment and say a prayer to ask God to reveal something about yourself that is hurting your marriage. I closed my eyes tight and said the prayer with an open heart. "Pride." As soon as I had completed the words, I heard it as clearly as if someone was standing right next to me and speaking to me. I was shocked. Not only that it was so clear and precise, but because I never would have guessed that I have this issue. I felt sure it was a mistake. I thought maybe I had projected the sound and thought all in my own mind. I actually decided to not give it much credit.

Since then, God has revealed this to me in small ways. (I think he knows that I don't handle large amounts of personal criticism well. I like small doses.) He daily shows me how I struggle with pride and how it impacts my relationships, my own life, and most of all, my nearness to Him.

Some of this is hard to accept. Pride is not a fun flaw to have. I believe God has a severe hatred in that particular character trait -- don't misunderstand me, He hates the sin, not the person. A person who is full of pride will not give God His due credit. That person loves to receive glory and praise and has a hard time sharing the spotlight, even with God. (Lord, you deserve ALL the glory, ALL the honor, and ALL the praise!)

I have come to believe that God's ability to work in me and through me is hindered by my pride. I think that he will not bless me with many spiritual gifts while I still possess this pride. It is for that reason that I have set out to battle against this sinful characteristic of myself. I don't want to be useless to God and to furthering the Kingdom.

I have the confidence that He will overcome, and that I can overcome through Him.

Lord, live in me! Move into me, until all of me is gone and only you remain!!